This summer has been a bit of a disappointment. I like being able to swim and be in the sun and sweat every now and again. Alas, Minnesota said, no chance sweetheart! Here it is August 1st and it is 74degrees(F). Oh and there is a tree outside my window that shows the signs of red leaves, what?????
Other than the weather I really can not complain. I have had fun with the family, friends and when possible getting a tan. Turns out I look so much better with a tan than without.
I just returned from a trip to Indianapolis where I saw my parents and was there with my family when dad had to go to the radiologist to determine if he needs radiation therapy after his chemo.
The good news is that dad may be in his late 70's but his body is more like 69/70. The doc was impressed. The good news is that there is no cancer that they can see in the PET scan, the bad news is we, as a family, need to make a decision of if dad wants to do radiation. I think he will do it for peace of mind. The last thing any of us wants is that in a year, he goes for a check up and they find another tumor and have to start from square one.
It is interesting what life throws at you, my sister Aliki, said something very interesting today, that why look at Cancer as a bad thing, what if we looked at it as an event that allows my parents to take a new chance on life, what it allows them to say to heck with all this we are leaving and moving to Greece, or wherever, why stay in a place that makes them unhappy. I liked that. It is a bit of a wake up call.
My dad was lucky, he had stage 1 non-Hodgkin lymphoma, it was caught at a very early stage and is the most "curable" of cancers.
It also turns out that my family kicks ass! We are always there for each other. No matter what is going on with each other we are all there to support, it never falls on just one of us. It falls on all of us, but Fall is such a bad/negative word, what it should be more like, is a challenge which allows us to all come together and participate. I am lucky to have a family like mine. My Aunt Marina, mothers sister, is visiting at the same time and it is wonderful to be able to have her part of the discussion.
Speaking of family, recently every time I visit my parents I am learning more interesting things about my grand-parents and great-grand parents. Turns out they were even more amazing than I thought. I come from very good stalk, and I am very proud.
This time around i found out that on my mothers side, the Kamitsis family, is a very philanthropic and giving family. When it came to any Greek form Constantinople/Smirni or any Asia Minor to come Palestine/Jerusalem, the family to talk to was my family, the Kamistis, they took care of everyone, my great grandfather built Mills in Palestine, he also helped a lot of people become settled in Palestine when they left Constantinople. He built a house just for immigrants coming into Palestine to help them get situated, provide lodging, food, money for the whole family until they were able to stand on their own two feet. Their name is still remembered. I also found out that when the 1948 war started and turned Palestine into Israel my family suffered beyond just loosing their homes, and mills, etc, they suffered more because they could not take all of the families that they were caring for to safety, they had to leave them behind. All they could take is a table cloth full of family heirlooms, clothes, food. My great grandfather/mother took this too heart and always felt a sense of guilt.
Recently, my Aunt Marina, met a man that after some discussion realized who she was and was almost in tears, because he was alive and successful because of the Kamitsis family,( my great-grandfather) helped his father with food, lodging, and work and because of that he was able to build a business that continues to thrive today and made this man a very wealthy man. It brought tears to all of our eyes.
I am thankful for who I am and where I come from everyday. I have a heritage and tradition that I am extremely proud of. I am very proud to call myself a Greek from Palestine. Not a Greek from Greece. A Greek from Asia Minor whose family (both mom and dad's side ended up in Palestine) that when push comes to shove really is where all the good stuff comes from!
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Monday, June 1, 2009
There is much darkness in the world
This saying is from a friend of ours. It can be used to describe any situation. And today is one of those days. The murder of Dr. Tiller, the Dr. who performed abortions, was killed in his church by a an Operation Rescue believer. In front of his family, and fellow church goers. Somehow this was okay to do in this mans head and also with the head of Operation Rescue. He said something to the extent that "Operation Rescue" has no blood on their hands, it was Dr. Tillers fault that he was killed. Hmmm, I wonder if he thinks that it is the victim of the rape that is at fault? Probably.
When did it become okay to murder outright? in plain view of the world and God? He does realize that he will go to hell right? I am pretty sure that one of the 10 Commandments says "Thou shalt not commit murder" Right?
I am so angry that this is not a bigger deal. I am so mad that people like Bill O'Reilly are allowed to continue to speak about this subject and not take any responsibility for the hatred. He actually called him Dr. Tiller the Killer, which is what the crazy righties called him. Absolutely insane!
I know that I am supposed to be a good person, but there is a part of me that wants this man to experience what he made Dr. Tillers family experience. Eye for an Eye.
Boy I am angry.
When did it become okay to murder outright? in plain view of the world and God? He does realize that he will go to hell right? I am pretty sure that one of the 10 Commandments says "Thou shalt not commit murder" Right?
I am so angry that this is not a bigger deal. I am so mad that people like Bill O'Reilly are allowed to continue to speak about this subject and not take any responsibility for the hatred. He actually called him Dr. Tiller the Killer, which is what the crazy righties called him. Absolutely insane!
I know that I am supposed to be a good person, but there is a part of me that wants this man to experience what he made Dr. Tillers family experience. Eye for an Eye.
Boy I am angry.
Friday, May 8, 2009
When you realze your family is fragile
I was visiting my parents with my family in Indianapolis a couple of weeks ago for Easter. Us Greeks celebrate the "Greek Orthodox" Easter which tends to follow Passover, because really you can not have Easter without Passover, but that is a different entry.
Anyway, we drove down there and realized, wow, 10 hours of flat, boring land is a major drag!
The meet up with the family had a two reasons:
1) Greek Easter
2) My daddy was diagnosed with Lymphoma. Good news it is not Hodgkin's, it is isolated in his lymph nodes in his neck and it is stage one!
The second reason made me, and my siblings, learn some new things and see our dad in a different light.
So diagnosis is stage one, with four rounds of Chemo. No fun what-so-ever. My dad has never been so sick that he has had to be hospitalized or even go to the doctor that much. So this is huge, in the past two years he has had three or four surgeries to remove the "walnuts" as dad called them. They kept being benign until a month ago, that is when they turned bad. So now we are all gathering around and helping each other, really mom, through this time. It is hard when we are scattered around the USA. Thank God we are at least in the same country.
In one of my earlier entries, I wrote about my parents and where they are from. Daddy was born in Palestine. At 18 years of age he and his family had to leave their homes, their things, friends, pets, chickens, etc, behind and hide out in his grandmothers house in a different part of Palestine. They lived in the heart of Jerusalem where the war was taking place in 1948. His family lost three homes and all of their belongings. That is about all we knew. Dad has had a real hard time forgetting and letting go. He gets angry when he thinks about it and just sad. A lot of people/friends/even family tell him "just get over it", "stop living in the past",etc.
I remember growing up we would ask to see pictures of our parents life, my mom had a lot to share and we were lucky enough to be around her family most of our life and were able to see so much from her life as a kid, teenager, etc. How she dressed, her homes, etc. However with dad we never did. It was not for lack of trying. Dad would always say there is nothing left, nothing, I have nothing to show you.
We were fortunate enough to visit a couple of times Israel, and visit where he grew up, where he want to school, but it was different.
Well this past visit was no different in the respect of dad bringing up his past and the family kind of saying "yes dad..." Except this time he did something that changed it for all of us I think. He brought out an album of his childhood. Turns out his Dad was really into photography, as is my dad. My grandfather was quite the photographer. So we spent a good long time looking at these pictures. Dad talked about each one like it was yesterday. Their home was beautiful, fresh, with a gorgeous garden, house made of stone, beautiful stone. His dog was adorable, found out he had a dog. It was so hard for him to discuss all of this, but it brought it home for me at least. One of his families tradition was that every First of May they would invite all of their friends, family, neighbors and eat strawberries and cream. This was quite a luxury in those days, People would come from all over for this event. They would then go for walks, hikes around Jerusalem pick flowers, make wreaths, etc.
Looking at those pictures helped put a lot in perspective. My father was 18 years old! He was not a kid, he was a man, he was looking at his life and loving it, and continuing his families traditions in their homes, etc. Except that did not happen, what happened was there homes were taken and they were asked, shoved, whatever to leave. Leave it all behind. How do you leave it all behind? Knowing there is nothing you can do, you can't fight, I mean you could but it was futile. My grandmother used to sneak in the middle of the war to her home in Jerusalem and take what ever she could carry, the clock that has been in the family since forever and was made in the 1600's (I think that was the time) the rugs, the pictures, the album, but most of it was lost.
My dad can not forget. His three best friends were able to. They also had to leave and they spread around the world, one in Greece, one in Seattle and the other in Australia. In the past 3-5 years my dad has visited them and asked them if they look back? They all said no. Once they left they never looked back. The anger just made them never look back. However my dad could not. It was too much. He understands that now, he knows that people are annoyed, all he wants is for people to acknowledge it, and stop telling him to just forget it. He wishes he could, he wishes he could be like his best friends and just forget. Maybe with this part of his life he will learn to slowly let go. He should be happy, he has led a good life, he provided so well for all of us. I hope that with this part of his life he learns to let go and have a light heart. He does not need to forget the past, he just needs to hold on to the good memories and look at all that he has created.
The funny thing is that my father is not the only one to feel that way. One would think that the younger generation would not care because they did not live through that, they did not experience anything like that. Except that I have friends my age, younger even who feel just like my dad. Their families, like mine, also lost everything. Everyone has a story. They are sad stories.
Yeah war is hell. It is beyond hell. So it always amazes me when there is one more war we fight. I guess we will never learn, ever.
So at the end of the day, we are all fragile. We think we are strong, we think we can handle it all but we can't and that is okay. The next three months will be an interesting time. I think there is more that we will learn about my dad. I look forward to going back to hang out with him after his treatments and look at the album again.
I think about how I feel, has his feeling of never forgetting, the anger, live in me? I don't think so, but I get to feel bad for my dad and all that he lost. However it is also up to me to help him look at the present and the future, mostly the present.
Anyway, we drove down there and realized, wow, 10 hours of flat, boring land is a major drag!
The meet up with the family had a two reasons:
1) Greek Easter
2) My daddy was diagnosed with Lymphoma. Good news it is not Hodgkin's, it is isolated in his lymph nodes in his neck and it is stage one!
The second reason made me, and my siblings, learn some new things and see our dad in a different light.
So diagnosis is stage one, with four rounds of Chemo. No fun what-so-ever. My dad has never been so sick that he has had to be hospitalized or even go to the doctor that much. So this is huge, in the past two years he has had three or four surgeries to remove the "walnuts" as dad called them. They kept being benign until a month ago, that is when they turned bad. So now we are all gathering around and helping each other, really mom, through this time. It is hard when we are scattered around the USA. Thank God we are at least in the same country.
In one of my earlier entries, I wrote about my parents and where they are from. Daddy was born in Palestine. At 18 years of age he and his family had to leave their homes, their things, friends, pets, chickens, etc, behind and hide out in his grandmothers house in a different part of Palestine. They lived in the heart of Jerusalem where the war was taking place in 1948. His family lost three homes and all of their belongings. That is about all we knew. Dad has had a real hard time forgetting and letting go. He gets angry when he thinks about it and just sad. A lot of people/friends/even family tell him "just get over it", "stop living in the past",etc.
I remember growing up we would ask to see pictures of our parents life, my mom had a lot to share and we were lucky enough to be around her family most of our life and were able to see so much from her life as a kid, teenager, etc. How she dressed, her homes, etc. However with dad we never did. It was not for lack of trying. Dad would always say there is nothing left, nothing, I have nothing to show you.
We were fortunate enough to visit a couple of times Israel, and visit where he grew up, where he want to school, but it was different.
Well this past visit was no different in the respect of dad bringing up his past and the family kind of saying "yes dad..." Except this time he did something that changed it for all of us I think. He brought out an album of his childhood. Turns out his Dad was really into photography, as is my dad. My grandfather was quite the photographer. So we spent a good long time looking at these pictures. Dad talked about each one like it was yesterday. Their home was beautiful, fresh, with a gorgeous garden, house made of stone, beautiful stone. His dog was adorable, found out he had a dog. It was so hard for him to discuss all of this, but it brought it home for me at least. One of his families tradition was that every First of May they would invite all of their friends, family, neighbors and eat strawberries and cream. This was quite a luxury in those days, People would come from all over for this event. They would then go for walks, hikes around Jerusalem pick flowers, make wreaths, etc.
Looking at those pictures helped put a lot in perspective. My father was 18 years old! He was not a kid, he was a man, he was looking at his life and loving it, and continuing his families traditions in their homes, etc. Except that did not happen, what happened was there homes were taken and they were asked, shoved, whatever to leave. Leave it all behind. How do you leave it all behind? Knowing there is nothing you can do, you can't fight, I mean you could but it was futile. My grandmother used to sneak in the middle of the war to her home in Jerusalem and take what ever she could carry, the clock that has been in the family since forever and was made in the 1600's (I think that was the time) the rugs, the pictures, the album, but most of it was lost.
My dad can not forget. His three best friends were able to. They also had to leave and they spread around the world, one in Greece, one in Seattle and the other in Australia. In the past 3-5 years my dad has visited them and asked them if they look back? They all said no. Once they left they never looked back. The anger just made them never look back. However my dad could not. It was too much. He understands that now, he knows that people are annoyed, all he wants is for people to acknowledge it, and stop telling him to just forget it. He wishes he could, he wishes he could be like his best friends and just forget. Maybe with this part of his life he will learn to slowly let go. He should be happy, he has led a good life, he provided so well for all of us. I hope that with this part of his life he learns to let go and have a light heart. He does not need to forget the past, he just needs to hold on to the good memories and look at all that he has created.
The funny thing is that my father is not the only one to feel that way. One would think that the younger generation would not care because they did not live through that, they did not experience anything like that. Except that I have friends my age, younger even who feel just like my dad. Their families, like mine, also lost everything. Everyone has a story. They are sad stories.
Yeah war is hell. It is beyond hell. So it always amazes me when there is one more war we fight. I guess we will never learn, ever.
So at the end of the day, we are all fragile. We think we are strong, we think we can handle it all but we can't and that is okay. The next three months will be an interesting time. I think there is more that we will learn about my dad. I look forward to going back to hang out with him after his treatments and look at the album again.
I think about how I feel, has his feeling of never forgetting, the anger, live in me? I don't think so, but I get to feel bad for my dad and all that he lost. However it is also up to me to help him look at the present and the future, mostly the present.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
It is a beautiful Day
Today started off kind of gray and yucky. But now it is 4pm and it is sunny and lovely. Wow the sun can really turn things around.
I have been sitting at home today while the kids and David are out skiing. I have the house to myself. So I cleaned it, a little. Then I watched Hairspray for the first time. It was a cute movie.
Today I am going to talk about food, I just re-read some of my posts and I am depressed!
Food, I love it. Growing up I did not enjoy a lot of food. Which is not good when you grow up in places like Asia. As an 8 year old you tend to see their food as strange. There is no kibeh or tiropita, or things like that. They have Kwaee Teaow, and chicken rice (the chicken is poached), etc. Some of it looks so weird that as an 8 year old I thought I was going to die. Except one summer my father took us to Thailand for a vacation. We stayed at the Dusit Thani hotel, it was lovely. And I remember the meal we had, because it was the day that I learned to love food. I was around 12. The flavours were fantastic, the rice, the lime, the spice, everything had so much flavour. I thought wow has any tasted this before? My parents were so excited. Finally the second child is eating normal food. Now they only had to deal with my brother Theo, who was so picky. He came to his senses later in his life I want to say College.
I still hate cauliflower and eggplant. My parents do not understand this since we are Greek/Arabs and both those vegetables are important part of our cuisine. I blame my dad, he made me eat this dish called, Matlubeh, it consisted of lamb, rice and cauliflower all cooked together. The consistency was just yuck, but my dad insisted i sit at the table and eat it. Back then I would play tricks. Now my dad and I can laugh about it. But I still will not eat it.
Now I have two kids and find myself going crazy because they won't eat anything. What is wrong with these kids? Then I remember my issues with food as a kid. You know what, they will come around. They have to at least try something once. I do not cook multiple meals, sorry this is not a restaurant.
Now I love to cook, I find it therapeutic and just a joy. Today I really want baked sweet potatoes and onions tossed in spinach. It is delicious, but for the life of me I did not know what to pair it with. Then the phone rang and my good friend Kerry asked "I am making leg of lamb you want to come over for dinner?" Perfect timing. My craving and Kerry's lamb will be a perfect match.
I can't wait to eat dinner.
I have been sitting at home today while the kids and David are out skiing. I have the house to myself. So I cleaned it, a little. Then I watched Hairspray for the first time. It was a cute movie.
Today I am going to talk about food, I just re-read some of my posts and I am depressed!
Food, I love it. Growing up I did not enjoy a lot of food. Which is not good when you grow up in places like Asia. As an 8 year old you tend to see their food as strange. There is no kibeh or tiropita, or things like that. They have Kwaee Teaow, and chicken rice (the chicken is poached), etc. Some of it looks so weird that as an 8 year old I thought I was going to die. Except one summer my father took us to Thailand for a vacation. We stayed at the Dusit Thani hotel, it was lovely. And I remember the meal we had, because it was the day that I learned to love food. I was around 12. The flavours were fantastic, the rice, the lime, the spice, everything had so much flavour. I thought wow has any tasted this before? My parents were so excited. Finally the second child is eating normal food. Now they only had to deal with my brother Theo, who was so picky. He came to his senses later in his life I want to say College.
I still hate cauliflower and eggplant. My parents do not understand this since we are Greek/Arabs and both those vegetables are important part of our cuisine. I blame my dad, he made me eat this dish called, Matlubeh, it consisted of lamb, rice and cauliflower all cooked together. The consistency was just yuck, but my dad insisted i sit at the table and eat it. Back then I would play tricks. Now my dad and I can laugh about it. But I still will not eat it.
Now I have two kids and find myself going crazy because they won't eat anything. What is wrong with these kids? Then I remember my issues with food as a kid. You know what, they will come around. They have to at least try something once. I do not cook multiple meals, sorry this is not a restaurant.
Now I love to cook, I find it therapeutic and just a joy. Today I really want baked sweet potatoes and onions tossed in spinach. It is delicious, but for the life of me I did not know what to pair it with. Then the phone rang and my good friend Kerry asked "I am making leg of lamb you want to come over for dinner?" Perfect timing. My craving and Kerry's lamb will be a perfect match.
I can't wait to eat dinner.
Friday, March 6, 2009
What does this all mean?
Is the world falling apart? Is this just our turn to feel hardship, etc? I think of my dad who met hardship at every turn but coming out stronger and smarter. He dealt with wars, losing countries, homes, etc. He made sure that his family never had to do without. We lived a good life, great cultural experiences, great food, drink, people etc. I wonder when he was going through his trials and tribulations if he thought that it was so bad that nothing could make it better.
I am an optimistic person, or at least I like to think of myself as such. It is hard to do that when I listen to the news, or when three friends of mine are laid off in the past week or so. These are my counterparts. It is scary.
It is hard to be optimistic when in California they are fighting for equal rights. And Ken Starr is the idiot trying to keep prop 8 alive and kicking.
It is hard to be optimistic when I actually have to think about health care issues that a lot of Americans are facing today. You always think that happens to others and it will never happen to you.
However I have to be optimistic, because I have two wonderful children who need me to be optimistic, strong, and a realist.
I have to be optimistic because we have a President that is intelligent, who understands how people are suffering. He is willing to take the heat. I want to see him more because he does provide me the optimism I need.
I do not want to listen or have to see people like Rush Limbaugh, Anne Coulter, or Bill O'reily. I do not watch or hear their shows but they tend to be on the news too much. Why are they the story? That is what they want, they want to be the story. I say we take them out of the story and ignore them. Maybe they will throw such a tantrum they will finally go away. Just like a two year old who drops to the floor and starts thrashing his legs, and him mom just ignores him. He finally stops and just goes off and plays or sleeps and the mom does not hear from him again all she hears is happiness.
At the end of the day we will all survive. It will be hard but I have faith that the universe will provide.
I am an optimistic person, or at least I like to think of myself as such. It is hard to do that when I listen to the news, or when three friends of mine are laid off in the past week or so. These are my counterparts. It is scary.
It is hard to be optimistic when in California they are fighting for equal rights. And Ken Starr is the idiot trying to keep prop 8 alive and kicking.
It is hard to be optimistic when I actually have to think about health care issues that a lot of Americans are facing today. You always think that happens to others and it will never happen to you.
However I have to be optimistic, because I have two wonderful children who need me to be optimistic, strong, and a realist.
I have to be optimistic because we have a President that is intelligent, who understands how people are suffering. He is willing to take the heat. I want to see him more because he does provide me the optimism I need.
I do not want to listen or have to see people like Rush Limbaugh, Anne Coulter, or Bill O'reily. I do not watch or hear their shows but they tend to be on the news too much. Why are they the story? That is what they want, they want to be the story. I say we take them out of the story and ignore them. Maybe they will throw such a tantrum they will finally go away. Just like a two year old who drops to the floor and starts thrashing his legs, and him mom just ignores him. He finally stops and just goes off and plays or sleeps and the mom does not hear from him again all she hears is happiness.
At the end of the day we will all survive. It will be hard but I have faith that the universe will provide.
Monday, February 16, 2009
There are some really stupid people out there
The senator from Illinois, Roland Burris. What an idiot. He lied, just to get to the senate, seriously people, there are tapes, tapes. It is not a joke. Now he has given the Republicans some stupid ammunition. He needs to step aside. His speech should go something like this - "I am sorry I am such a megalomaniac. I just wanted to add one more item to my mausoleum!" "Now I will go away and you shall never hear from me again".
Then we have the republicans going on how the stimulus was created without them and in secret. My goodness they really do see things backwards. I guess the visits with senators, lunch, cocktails, and adding more tax cuts to show that Obama was listening, they dare to say, the stimulus was created in secret. I want to throw a rotten egg at each and every one of them. Someone needs to remind them that for 8 years there president Bush, never did any of those things, I think he may have gone to congress once to say "Hey, what up, this is a big place, heh, heh"
I am just annoyed, let's just pass this and give it some time to work. Oh and the two senators (R) trying to now get some credit for the stimulus after voting no for it, please you are embarrassing yourselves, not that you care.
That is my rant for today. Thanks for listening.
Tomorrow I will write about something fun, maybe food.
Then we have the republicans going on how the stimulus was created without them and in secret. My goodness they really do see things backwards. I guess the visits with senators, lunch, cocktails, and adding more tax cuts to show that Obama was listening, they dare to say, the stimulus was created in secret. I want to throw a rotten egg at each and every one of them. Someone needs to remind them that for 8 years there president Bush, never did any of those things, I think he may have gone to congress once to say "Hey, what up, this is a big place, heh, heh"
I am just annoyed, let's just pass this and give it some time to work. Oh and the two senators (R) trying to now get some credit for the stimulus after voting no for it, please you are embarrassing yourselves, not that you care.
That is my rant for today. Thanks for listening.
Tomorrow I will write about something fun, maybe food.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Tired
We need Franken in the senate. The RNC is not being very nice. They are being a bit of the sore loser.
If Franken was in the senate it would have been a little easier to pass the stimulus bill, and perhaps the one congressman who was attending his mothers funeral did not have to come back from the funeral to vote.
I have found myself not listening to the news as much anymore. It was hard during the Bush time but now it is just scary.
I think I heard that some of the RNC folk actually are describing themselves as the Taliban, that they are learning their tactics to make it hard for the democratic party. Does that mean they are terrorist? Seriously they want to say that out loud?
Anyway, I am just tired of listening to the news and to the words that mean nothing because there are those who would rather see this country fail, I truly believe that,m especially when the fat man, Rush Limbaugh, says he wants President Obama to fail. That is not very uniting. I am sure that there are some Taliban and Al Qaeda doing a happy dance in a cave in the mountains of Pakistan.
Rush, maybe you can go visit them and learn more.
If Franken was in the senate it would have been a little easier to pass the stimulus bill, and perhaps the one congressman who was attending his mothers funeral did not have to come back from the funeral to vote.
I have found myself not listening to the news as much anymore. It was hard during the Bush time but now it is just scary.
I think I heard that some of the RNC folk actually are describing themselves as the Taliban, that they are learning their tactics to make it hard for the democratic party. Does that mean they are terrorist? Seriously they want to say that out loud?
Anyway, I am just tired of listening to the news and to the words that mean nothing because there are those who would rather see this country fail, I truly believe that,m especially when the fat man, Rush Limbaugh, says he wants President Obama to fail. That is not very uniting. I am sure that there are some Taliban and Al Qaeda doing a happy dance in a cave in the mountains of Pakistan.
Rush, maybe you can go visit them and learn more.
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